�����Okay, so; I was playing FFXI last night (read on, it's not technical). I took a few minutes, I gathered a party, and I set out to do my Rank5 Mission. Grabbing random members off the search function is called a Pick-Me-Up party. There's sometimes problems with pick-me-up parties, you see; sometimes the members are retarded. You have no choice who will come along.
�����I'm gunna write this episodically, for convenience...

�����The party I've put together is three people. Me, and two guys - personal friends (not mine). We head out to our first dungeon for the night at around midnight.
�����I'm lower level then the rest, but I have quested far more, so I am the only one with a map. We made a deal, so we could all do this: They will fight; I will guide. Five minutes into the adventure, I notice that Goober #1 isn't following me. I see him on my map, and tell him: "Head south, and make a right at the first intersection." Five minutes pass and I check my map. He is more than two times the distance from me he was. Oh god. "What's going on? Where are you, man?" And Goober #1 actually, honestly, genuinely replies:
"What's an intersection?".
I go to pick him up.

�����Five more minutes pass. Asshole #1 agros a monster onto himself. Rather than sitting, and letting us fight it (Any one of us could have whooped it), he runs off like an idiot. And links on ten more creatures. And dies. And takes twenty minutes to run back.
�����Upon his return he yells: "Zaine! (that's me) What the shit?! You killed me!" Yes, he blames ME somehow. His logic is that, because I am lower, more monsters will agro to me. This is true, except that it doesn't mean no monsters will agro him. The first shot (actions are logged) was struck on him. He did it.

�����A little later. The same thing happens again. He agros a creature and bolts off. He blames me again. Only this time, when it happened, I am Invisible and Sneaked. (No monsters can detect me.) So, proof. I finally have undeniable proof. He doesn't buy it. He dies again. I regret coming.

�����Don't worry; it gets worse...
�����We're done with our objective; we have to run out. Pretty easy. The monsters are hard, but we just have to ninja through the crowd unseen. We have to pass through a transparent wall first. I wait til it's clear and bolt through. Asshat #2 does as well. Asshat #1, well, he... basically cries. "Someone sleep the bad guys! Zaine, cast sleep on them." But, you see, I am a Monk. Monks have no magic. No, not even sleep. I explain as much, and he replies: "Shut up! Just do it!" "Um, dude. I can't. It's a real impossibility." "Stop being an ass! Freakin do it!"
�����Now, this was in the second dungeon, where none of us had maps, but I had directions. I say fuck it, and start to ninja out. He finally comes out, agros four monsters (which we couldn't even take one of), and cries that (again) it's my fault because me, a Monk/Samurai, would not cast black magic for him.
�����He charges past me, and agros some onto me. He goes bolting off to I-don't-know-where. Me, ten levels lower, goes bolting toward the exit, visual memory alone, and barely escapes with 50HP. He dies a third time and I regret ever having come.

�����I think it ended with his making some vague reference to never partying with me again.

�����I know there's better places for this, but, hey. This is my site. ;) I thought it was a decent story.
�����And now, I hate my life.

�

---Danny